It’s not all good or bad

In the ancient Celtic tradition, November 1st marked as a new year and beginning of dark, cold winter. The day before was the last day of summer and the end of harvest time. A day full of mystery and magic.

The boundary between worlds of living and dead was believed to be blurry on the night of new year. The otherworldly spirits returned on earth – both the good and the bad. However, as it always happens with time, the Celtic traditions were mixed with other traditions, like Roman and Christian, and formed new traditions.

Nevertheless, the magic and the mystery still belongs to this time of the year. It reminds us of how the conditions can suddenly change. How we have no control over them, nor should have. How it’s not all bad or all good. It depends much on how we choose to view it.

The way of seeing life, where there’s a clear line between all things, is such an outdated way of going about. There’s so much more in between! Called life.

When we hang on to rigid systems and structures, we only end up hurting both ourselves and others. The minute someone deviates, whether by way of actions, beliefs or opinions, the need to control takes over. And the hurting begins.

If we think that there’s only one right way and the rest is wrong, it hurts every time someone sees things differently. And hurts even more when we try to correct them and make them see our point. The right point. Ha! 

Instead of control and limit, let’s embrace and appreciate. All the different ways of going about life. None of them is all good or all bad. Each and every one includes both.

Feeling uptight and irritated by the way others are acting? Or by the way they see things? Or because they don’t understand that you’re right?

Not to worry. This happens to us all sometimes. And here’s what to do about it. (Just be warned, it’s not about changing or controlling the others – it’s about changing and controlling yourself!)

It’s time for you to zoom your focus out of the details, the nitty-gritty of what’s bothering you. Just enough, so that you can see the big picture.

Look at it as a picture on your phone or on your camera. If you’ve zoomed in all the way, you only see part of the whole picture. One detail of it. That’s you, when you’re trying to make someone see things the way you see them. Feeling uptight and irritated. But it eases up when you zoom the focus out and start to see the whole picture again.  

For example, if it’s a particular person, that’s bothering you, focus on what’s good about that person (she/he is not all bad, you know). Or what you have in common with that person. If those are pushing it a bit too much, focus on what you have in common with people in general.

The more general you are, the easier it is to zoom out. It doesn’t help, if you jump from one detail to another. It’s time to view the entity.

What if Democritus got it right, when he said, that “nothing exists except atoms and empty space; everything else is opinion.”

In what kind of a world would we live, if we were to embrace all sorts of views? Not just the kind that agree with yours? In a world where there’s no judgement by differences?

Opening up to see that nothing is all good or all bad and that there’s no absolute right or wrong, is called learning. And that’s were life happens. In the learning.

Much love,